Monthly Archives: December 2012

The Intelect of Cows – A Very Scientific Theory

My parents have a lovely ranch in the beautiful Texas Hill Country.  It is always a peaceful visit and much-needed escape from the madness of our daily lives.  We usually spend most of the time just hanging out with family, enjoying the outdoors and being far away from anything or anyone.

There are an abundance of deer that run alongside as we drive by.  My kids love to watch them.  They really are very graceful animals, able to leap high fences with such amazing ease.

One trip, however, my brother-in-law went hunting (yes, in season) with my dad and husband, and came back with a deer.  The kids were in bed when they dragged the body of the limp creature away from the car and then hung it upside down to prepare it.  It is a gruesome process, I must admit, and I certainly had no desire to watch it.  For that matter, I had a hard time sampling the meat when it came back from processing.  Anyway, my daughter heard the commotion and came out and saw, to her horror, the deer (I will leave out gory details, but it was an awful sight).   She screamed and went on and on the rest of the night about how she was so mad at her uncle for killing the deer and that she would NEVER eat a deer.  She also vowed to tell her future husband he was not allowed to kill a deer, either.  She was quite upset, poor thing.  I told her it was okay to kill an animal if you need it for food, but that we never kill for fun or for sport.  I told her that when she eats chicken and beef, that was once a little animal, too.

That was a year ago.  Ever so often, when we visit the ranch and we see a deer, she tells me how she would never kill one.

We just returned from a nice visit, and of course, the deer killing thing came up immediately with the first deer we saw.

“I am never killing a deer,” she announced.

“But you eat cows and they were killed,” the 8-year old pointed out.

“Yeah, but cows are stupid,” she replied.

“Why are cows stupid and deer are not?”  I asked, already amused.

“Well, when there is a tornado, cows just stand there eating grass like this.”  She did her best cow smacking grass impression.  “And even though the tornado is coming, they just keep eating grass.  They don’t run away or do anything.  They just let themselves die by the tornado!  And that is stupid.”



Sugar and Spice vs. The Puppy Dog Tails

My 5 and 3-year old were up before everyone else, as usual.  They happily bounced about the house with their Christmas presents as I sat playing on my iPad and Grandma made breakfast.  My 5-year old received an adorable put-together-yourself-in-a-variety-of-ways mansion for about 10 accompanying small, rubber farm animals.  She was having fun arranging the houses and the animals.

Meanwhile, the 3-year old ran around with his big brother’s Captain America, being as loud as possible.

“Grandma, look!” my daughter squealed happily, after completing the first construction.  Grandma obligingly went to see her creation.

“I love it!” she said.  A few minutes passed and reconfigurations were made to the animal fortresses.

“Grandma, now look!” Again, she  went and looked  and told her it was beautiful and amazing.  This happened a few more times, and each time, Grandma looked and praised with the same enthusiasm.

All this time, the 3-year old had been running back and forth, seemingly unaware of anything else around him.

Then suddenly, “Grandma, LOOK!!!”  he yelled.  And being the good grandma that she is, she went to her grandson.

“Look, Grandma.  I have blood!”  And he showed her a tiny speck on his finger, of which he was quite proud.

Turning Five

A few days ago, the only little girl in the house turned five.  Apparently, turning five is a major milestone!

Grandpa called early in the morning to wish her a happy birthday.

“How do you feel now that you are five?” he asked.

“Good,” she replied.

“Do you feel any different?  Has anything changed?”

“Well,” she began, “I can make my own waffles!”

“Oh wow!” She was pleased with his reaction and I guess felt the need to take it up a notch.

“Yep!  And I can make my own cakes and bread and doughnuts!  And I won’t whine anymore or say things with a bad attitude (she imitated a bad attitude ‘I’m sorry’).”

“Wow!”  Again, he was impressed, and she beamed.

Later in the day, I asked the birthday girl to watch her baby brother in his play room for a few minutes while I finished getting dressed.  Her reply?

“Sure, I can do that!  That’s not a big deal at all for a five year old.”

What great ambitions she has!  Now if I could only bottle them up!




Wall Art

I’m sure you know where I’m headed with a title like that!

This is an old story, but one that I was reminded of the other day.

When my 3.5 year old was a newly turn 2-year old, he found a purple marker.  It was brand new and full of ink, ideal for the task at hand.

I was watching my own four (at the time) plus my sister’s two children.  The house was, to say the least, busy.  So, a little boy who had just found an irresistible purple marker, left for even a few minutes, could do a lot of damage.

I was alerted to the scribbling, of course, AFTER the fact.  He had already finished his creation when one of his very helpful older brothers informed me nonchalantly that he had colored on the walls and the stairs.

Let me be more specific.  He doodled on the walls at EACH STEP up.  He paused every few steps to try the marker out on the carpet.

Now, as I did not catch him in the act, I took a few minutes to calm down and think of what to do next.  I also took into consideration the age-appropriateness, albeit, the annoyance of his offense.

I settled on the following:

Taking my little child firmly by the hand, I went up each step and pointed to the scribble.  “No, no, NO!”  I said.  I did this to each section of the wall, or carpet, until we had gone all the way to the top of the stairs where we found the purple marker (now out of ink, of course).  “No, no, NO!”  I must have said it 20 times.

Then, my sweet child lifted up his shirt to reveal quite the purple tattoo, pointed to it and said, “No, no, NO!”